Has it really been more than a month since I've last typed? Not good, not good at all, considering this thing is supposed to be set up as an online vent/therapy session. That either means I have experienced exceptional mental clarity and a seamless lifestyle... or I've botteled everything up.
The whole idea was to scribble daily notes from my relentlessly undulating frame of mind... but in that regard the amplitude has waned considerably. Not so many highs, not so many lows, but a general sense of progress and more confidence in the future.
Today was a wet-chamois day on the bike. Accuweather.com claims a temp of 42 degrees here in the valley. 42 degrees and raining makes for a short ride, typically, though today I managed to log an hour and a half. Jason Dykstra, a team mate and riding buddy, would call my ride today a Gilligan Ride, ie no plan or purpose or time frame; just feeling it out and podunking along. I swung by to see Remi, simply curious whether I would find him alive or not since it has been so long. He is, of course, alive. It is always good and troubling to see him all at once. I hope that he finds some balance someday, not because I doubt his cycling abilities, but because I know the dangers of placing all your eggs in one basket. It is akward to not have anything except riding to talk about, and with Remi we often find dead spots in the conversation.
Things back at the Ranch are tense, but that is all part of living with roommates and living with a significant other. I've never been in the situation I am in now, so there is no retrospection to help me decide the correct way to act or feel. I sometimes wish there was a neutral third party overwatching my life and relationships, helping to sort out when I overstep and when I am stepped on. I won't embellish the relationship topic, but things are OK just hard.
Blah. Most boring entry to date. Hard to feel creative when the weather is so gloomy. Hard to do anything but eat, sleep, and drink hot beverages when the weather is gloomy. Seattle has a whole lot of damn good restaurants and four billion coffee shops for that very reason. Class is calling for me, unfortunately.
